Downsizing the milk milk factory

March began with a swollen boob.. That was the second time I had a blockage at that same spot on my right. The last time was also when I was on MC and couldn't use the better of my two pumps in office. And now, I'm blocked there again, argh!

Anyway, the next day, I decided to stop nursing/pumping in mid-day. So even though it was a Saturday and I was with him, I gave him a bottle in the day. But as it was the first day, I got swollen enough in the late afternoon to warrant a nursing session.. But by Sunday, I was able to get by to early evening. And by Monday, I managed to wait until his evening feed. Swollen, yes, but not unbearable. In any case, I was on a course so there was no other way. Perfect timing to stop, I suppose..

So I only managed to give him two bottles of expressed breastmilk for the first few days of no mid-day pump - a combined effort from my tiny store of frozen milk and the morning one-sided pump. By the end of the week on 8 March, I only managed one pathetically small bottle.. And the following week, I finally popped the last frozen milk cube into a small bottle to top it up. Sigh..

Then last Saturday, I decided to stop the morning pump too. I just let him nurse on both sides in the morning. In any case, I was pumping much less than before. And we were going to St Regis and I had no intention of lugging a pump along!

So there, I'm now pump-free. Brought back all my pump essentials from the office last Friday, and kept all my pump essentials at home by Sunday.

It's a little sad that I've stopped pumping. For one, formula milk is expensive! (And it gives stinky poop!) But most importantly, I feel somewhat guilty towards ZK that I couldn't give him more breastmilk until he's one. I know giving him only breastmilk for the first six months is already very good, and I still nurse him directly morning and night now, but well, I can't help thinking sometimes how nice it would be to give him breastmilk in his first year! Too many nazi mums around me :p

On the other hand, I get to really enjoy the morning feed now. (I can't see ZK very well during the night feed :p) In the past, I always had to split my attention between ZK and the pump. Now, I can just look at him, my little one :) Or snuggle in bed with him in the morning and nurse him there. It's a wonderful feeling, especially now that he would look intently at me every so often during a feed :)

Well, I will have to wean him off completely at some point anyway. Hope to do it before we get pregnant again!